aiko's otter den

raise your weapon - Dusk threw away his past, his life, everything, to become a spy to preserve order. He’s now got to don the look of a family man and get a wife and child, all to prevent a war! Meanwhile, Bam is a beleaguered law secretary, struggling with identity. Miseng is a child looking to stop running. Hijinks will ensue. SxF au

Now with art by yole!

---

Chapter 3

“I’m worried about you, Bam.”

Hatz says this often, and his brother means it honestly. He usually worries over the big brother who raised him all alone, about the brother who wore skirts and worked with Jahad sympathizers and spent every spare moment forgoing school and making money and, unbeknownst to him, killing people. Hatz worried for his older sibling in a lot of ways, but some of it is “will you find someone as you are?”

And Bam had lied and told his brother he didn’t want anyone.

It wasn’t entirely a lie. How could he hide who he was forever from a partner? Most people in the city of gold didn’t like men. Or they thought they could fix him. He remembered a time in the past where a coworker tried to just not wear a suit with a skirt below the knee without leggings. There had been so much teasing in the office. He told them to stop.

He remembers laughter.

At least, he thinks wryly, Ehwa hadn’t laughed about that.

So it was better not to worry about it. Loved ones were for people who weren’t assassins.

Viole grimaces at the clock and the bloodstains on his clothes. It’s after midnight again. At least Hatz won’t call for a few more days. He hasn’t missed him this time.

“My prince.”

Hwaryun’s voice is dry and sweet, like a red wine. Not a hair out of place, delicately framing her elegant eye patch. She’s dressed in scruffy clothes and they make her look beautiful.

Viole turns to look at her. “This one struggled a little.” His voice is wooden, golden eyes boring into her red one as he gestures with a knife.

She smiles. “Good. It can never be too easy for you, my prince. You have a full schedule tomorrow and your laundry won’t do itself.”

Viole wonders why that’s her concern and not the sharpness of his knives, but then, they’ve never had to worry about the perfection of his kills. They’re dead and he leaves them arranged the way his higher ups wanted. Jinsung-nim couldn’t have done it better.

“All right.” It’s not worth arguing about. She has her hangups.

“The money will be in your account tomorrow morning.”

“Thank you.” More into savings, more for his brother. Maybe he can finally purchase a new stove and oven or even a new mattress. Living frugally isn’t hard. He’s slept on the floor before, but it would be nice…

You’re lucky FUG lets you have a bank account, sneers her voice in his head. He wonders how she sounds now.

Viole simply leaves, eager for bed and a break from being on his feet.

Some prince he’s turned out to be. His bed is so inviting.

---

Khun is late.

Dusk has never worried much on time before. He’s where he needs to be when he needs to be. But Khun Aguero Agnis has a date to make it to, and he’s not going to mess that up! Not for anything, especially not for something as trivial as a poor impression.

But between struggling to make a meal for Miseng (they’d ended up ordering out) and helping Isu track down an important informant that had been trying to off himself, it makes sense he was late.

That doesn’t mean Dusk isn’t cursing himself for it. He has dried blood on his jacket, for fucks’ sake. How unprofessional.

Still, Bam had seemed at least sweet and that she’s not there at the meeting spot (the kindly clerk closing up says she left just a few minutes ago) is a testament of how late he is and that’s a terrible first impression, how is he going to convince her to work with him like this?

The Yeon party is thankfully very obvious, done at a house decorated with gently unobtrusive flames. Dusk wipes the blood from his face and then digs for his spare jacket. The wound trickles on his shoulder. He ties it behind the cover of a tree. Looking at himself, Khun exhales. Not pristine, imperfect, but it’s all he has. It’ll have to be enough.

He introduces himself to the guard in front. Smart, the way he sneers is fitting. Also keeps interesting hangers on out. So Khun runs inside. A spy would walk. A late date who gives a shit would run.

When he reaches the door, a Yeon opens it, a genuine direct line Yeon. the burn marks on the door prove it. Her pink eyes narrow, scrutinizing Khun with a wrinkled nose. “Who are you?” she asks, suspicion edging on rude.

He smiles quickly to avoid bashing her face in. “Hi, I was supposed to come in with Bam, but I had a rough patient.”

The woman’s nose wrinkles, and she opens her mouth to speak. Before she can, a voice comes from inside, full and overwhelmed with relief.

“Khun-ssi?”

Khun leans over the Yeon’s head to see Bam sitting surrounded by who he guesses were coworkers. There’s a young man with blond hair on her right, looking a bit like a deer in headlights. Khun glimpses small bright red horns.

That’s Wangnan Ja, the recent Academy graduate. So she was friends, or at least knew him.

Interesting.

Khun waves awkwardly. “Good evening. Apologies for being late.”

Bam gets to her feet. “Not at all, I’m glad you’re here…” The Yeon girl flashes the oddest look at the two of them before going to another group. Bam laughs a little. “Sorry, Ehwa-ssi thought I was joking when I mentioned you at work.”

It wasn’t just her. As Khun follows Bam, he glimpses the way the other ladies, coworkers, gossiping little seagulls, close around Ehwa like a pack of wolves. One hovers there, sipping finely aged wine and eating bits of crab like a real queen.

Endorsi Jahad? At a common house party? Even a Yeon house party is a party. Something good must be here, or the gossip it’s generating will be worth it for years.

That’s not his mission to focus on, but he can send a message to headquarters when he gets home tonight. He settles beside Bam, who smooths the edges of her neat skirt with practiced fingertips. She has short nails, sure, but her hands have a lot of calluses, even compared to one who cooks. The others are wearing… not exactly inappropriate dress for a party, but almost everyone is in a skirt or dress that ends above the knee and the sleeves are short to non-existent.

Bam is in long sleeves and leggings, with flat shoes and her ponytail braided gently flat on her back. Modesty? Lack of interest in showing off? With Wangnan Ja as a friend, there wasn’t much need to worry about things like that. Reputation would carry a person.

Miseng’s enthusiastic “da!” in the store dings in his mind. Khun dismisses it and ingratiates himself into the conversation. Turns out they’re discussing universities and needling about subject choices. Khun listens and occasionally drops mentions of psychology classes he’s never taken, experiences he’s never even been near remotely.

Bam listens. Her gold eyes are intent on whoever is talking, and no one seems to mind. Though Endorsi’s hazel gaze never strayed towards them for long, the other girls in the group look at them with discomfort and… a hint of meanness.

“Your brother couldn’t make it today?” someone says to Bam suddenly.

Bam laughs. It’s high, a startling crack to it. “He’s working late tonight. It’s the cost of being an honor student. I can’t wrangle him into bed anymore.”

“Don’t remind me,” Wangnan groans.

“You’re not an honor student yet, Wangnan-ssi,” Bam says gently. “But you’ll get there! I believe in you.”

“You should go to college, Bam,” Endorsi says suddenly. “You’d finally meet a man who can keep up with you.”

Khun raises an eyebrow, then takes in the look of unreadable discomfort on Bam’s face. He knows the City of Gold allows women to get certifications, but full on college degrees? That’s reserved for Jahad princesses and whoever they sponsor usually.

“I’m happy where I am for now, but if that’s an endorsement, Endorsi-ssi, I’ll keep it in mind.” Her smile shifts a little and Endorsi just smirks.

“I think it’s admirable,” Khun says suddenly. The response, the counter to her expression, that annoying little smirk, hits him like a train. “There’s nothing wrong with focusing on one’s family and life circumstances. Caring for her little brother when no one else would, there’s nothing particularly amusing about that. It’s just kindness and these days, especially during the war, that’s very rare. I think it’s something to be proud of.”

Everyone stares at him and Khun shrugs, unrepentant. “But then, I’m a single father. A little kindness goes a long way for me, as well.”

The smile sliding off the princess’ face is dangerous, but worth it.

Triumph fades in 0.2 seconds when a loud boom rockets across the mansion.

Khun doesn’t think, misses the way shock fades into calculation and calm. He just grabs Bam’s hand and shouts out, “Fire! Everyone evacuate!”

Most people panic. Bam flattens herself against the wall and shoves Wangnan back with her. He coughs and winces. “Smoke… how did you—”

“It’s either a fire or a bomb,” Khun says. “I recognize that boom. We need to get out and get to safety. Come on.”

Slowly. Bam’s expression seems to still and then she nods. She’s watching the people run and panic even as Endorsi and the local Yeon firebug come to a semblance of order on getting people out. Khun looks for a window. “It’ll be faster to take to the roof, if you don’t mind.” And fewer witnesses.

“You go ahead,” Wangnan pants, covering his nose. “We’ll make sure everyone’s here. Bam, you probably shouldn’t be here.”

And just what does that mean?

Bam nods and eases herself through the open window with a speed that should not be normal for an ordinary office worker, but wouldn’t be out of place escaping orphanages.

… Probably better not to think about that.

Khun moves after her and sees the smoke immediately billowing into the air from the other side of the building. “Which way?”

Bam looks around. “Follow me.” Her steps are light and quick and Khun trails after her before she grimaces and takes off her shoes, stuffing them into her purse and beginning a careful climb down. Tights were expensive, if he recalled correctly.

“You do this often?”

She laughs, a sound between a giggle and a snort. “More than you would expect. Many people go after Ehwa-ssi, but mostly it’s because the others all get very drunk and I cannot keep up, so I shut the window behind me. They tease me before it the next weekend.”

“Strange.”

“But thank you for coming, even so. It was nice to have someone next to me.” She smiles and Khun… wonders. “So about that fake marriage—”

Khun is tired. He’s been up for too many hours on too little sleep and been doing way too much, so it’s not his fault he face plants onto the pavement at the sound of another boom in the distance.

“Khun-ssi!” And then she picks him up and carries him to a bench, oh this is so unprofessional.

“I’m fine,” he manages. “It’s just… it’s been a long day. Rough patients, you know how it is.”

“I do,” Bam agrees, likely just to humor him. “So, about that marriage…”

“Yes?” Khun rasps. He’s so tired and this person is so casual.

“I would be glad to help you,” Bam continues. “It would benefit me in a multitude of ways. However, before you agree, I’d like for you to understand something?”

What? Khun thinks weakly. Are you a super secret assassin?

Bam looks around and then exhales. “I’m a man, Khun-ssi.”

For a moment, Khun’s brain blanks. “You mean like crossdressing as a woman?” he blurts before he can think better of it.

Bam lets out a long breath. “No. I was born a girl and identify as a man.” She — he, okay, switch brain, switch — swallows. “You’re the second person I’ve told.”

“Oh.” Khun wills his brain back on. ‘I see.’ Yes, this isn’t something people like to talk about in the City of Gold, or most places. He knows FUG and Wolhaiksong are more open with it, or accepting, but this place? Jahad’s territory? The Ten Great Families’ war zone? “Why would that inhibit me from wanting to pretend to marry you?”

Bam looks at him with an incredibly thoughtful expression. Then he rubs his eyes. “I still like men, Khun-ssi.”

Oh. Oh.

“I mean, that works for the situation,” Khun points out, fiddling with his jacket pocket. “You’re not exactly shouting it to the rooftops, and even if you could, I doubt you would. This city is rather… stubborn in its ways.”

Bam laughs. “That’s one way to put it, yes.”

“Is there anything I should change? With how I speak to you?” He really needs to know how Miseng clocked it with no hints of anything. It was uncanny. No wonder she was so clever. Book smarts were an easy fix, and with Bam, who had raised a little brother all on his own, that would resolve itself. But street smarts, instincts like that? Natural.

“Not in public, no.” The idea of being out in public as a man makes a complicated expression on a gentle face like that. “But if we were to be in private, and if I could explain it and express myself to Miseng, that would be ideal. But if my circumstances don’t bother you, I’d like to help you fulfill your wife’s and your dream.”

Khun deep down doubts that if he’d had a partner for real, he’d want them that close to Jahad, or anyone involved in the families.

Instead of saying so, he says, as coherently as he can muster. “Then let’s get married.”

Bam laughs again, and it makes Khun’s stomach do a tired flip.

Keep it together, Dusk.

---

Miseng is, of course, ecstatic. She gets two dads, and one’s a secret assassin dad and one’s a spy dad! Who at school has that?

---

Bam, drunk on the relief of acceptance, and the possibility of being somewhere where he didn’t have to budget for rent and food and his brother’s university bills (why was he working and studying Bam barely had time to eat between kills some days), and utilities and maybe, just maybe he could take up a hobby now, missed his weekly call with his brother.

This isn’t too uncommon. Hatz misses them at least once every couple of months, claiming to pass out at his desk. Bam usually misses about the same, caught up in a meal prepping for a lunch picnic or for himself.

Unfortunately, this time there was the house fire to consider. So Hatz, heedless of phone call costs and common sense or even just going to his sibling’s tiny flat, rings him incessantly. It forces Bam to get up from his long soak in the bath (hehe, he can take long baths!) and stumble out in his towel to pick up the phone.

“Hello?” he manages, trying not to giggle like a child.

“Hyung???!!” Hatz yelps through the phone. “You’re okay!”

“Hatz?” Bam yawns. “Of course I’m okay. I never stay out late.” A little white lie.

“Yeon Ehwa’s mansion is still on fire! Did she do it on purpose this time?”

“Hatz.” Bam lets out a sigh. ‘Ehwa-ssi doesn’t intentionally burn her house down.’ No, she saves that for target practice and Wangnan’s takeout meals that she pretends to hate because neither of them can cook. “I got out just fine with Khun-ssi.”

“You’re friends with Khuns now??”

Bam almost puts down the receiver. “Hatz you sound very, very high-strung. Are you all right?”

“My big brother did not answer when there was a house fire at a Yeon house. Of course I’m not alright!”

Bam couldn’t help but smile. His brother has taken protecting him all the more seriously since he’d learned the hazard of being able to keep their family name. “I made it out safely and clearly am at home. Khun-ssi walked me home. He asked me out. I accepted.”

“You’re dating a Khun?”

Bam frowns, giddiness giving way to semantics. “I think I’ve married him, actually.”

Silence.

Then Hatz exhales. “How long have you been married to him for??”

“Long engagement,” Bam adds to himself. “So about a year. His daughter was recovering from an awful disease, so we focused on that. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about it.”

At more silence from the receiver, Bam utters a good night and hangs up on his brother before the panic fades into rage. That Hatz was yelling and kicking up a fuss probably means he was really worried.

He’ll make him some cookies in the morning to make up for it. His favorites. That should help.

← previous - next →